#it keeps trying to fight him

[corishadowfang]

GIVE BRAIN A HORSE-- (I'm joining the horseposting, haha.)

---

            “…Master Brain.  What is that?”

            Brain, for his part, didn’t seem particularly concerned with the situation.  He wasn’t even looking at Sigurd, calmly petting the—the creature he’d apparently decided to lead into Headquarters.  “A horse.”

            “…Right.  I…suppose I can see that.”  Sigurd had the vague urge to rub his temples.  Or shake Brain, maybe—but then, he supposed he probably wasn’t supposed to do that to a Union Leader, so vaguely-strained questioning would have to do.  “And…why is it here?”

            “Followed me.”

            “From where?”

            Brain finally looked at him and grinned, smile just a little too sharp for his liking.  “Don’t worry about it.”

            …He was going to have to file an incident report later, wasn’t he.

            “Master Brain,” Sigurd said, trying very, very hard to keep his voice level and failing, “you didn’t…steal this, did you?”

            “Not as far as you’re aware.  Her name’s Lux, by the way.”

            “Master Brain—”

            “She belonged to Romulus and I owed Remus a favor.”  Brain shrugged, like that was a normal thing to do, but Sigurd guessed he didn’t really know what the Union Leaders had done on their off-time.  (It was such a strange image that it threw him for a moment.  The Union Leaders, engaging in petty theft and pranks?  It didn’t fit the image that had been built up in the stories.)

            “What would Master Ephemer think,” Sigurd started, trying to get his train of thought back on track, “if he found out you’d stolen someone’s—”

            “He’d help, probably.”  Brain tilted his head, looking thoughtful.  “Maybe not successfully.”  Gently, he tugged on the horse’s halter, and it took Sigurd a moment to realize he was bringing her closer, wait no he didn’t know how to act around horses—  “She’s not going to hurt you,” Brain said, face crinkling in amusement that seemed sincere rather than the strained sort of thing Sigurd usually saw.  “Look, just pet her.  She’s pretty gentle.”

            The horse nosed his shoulder with a quiet snort, and Sigurd side-stepped a little, hands pulled in.  It made her nervous, apparently, because she pulled her head back quickly, ears flicking and hooves tapping an unsteady sort of beat.  Brain shushed her, and she calmed quickly, but Sigurd stared at her with trepidation.

            …Of all the things the Union Leader had done, this was probably one of the strangest.  He’d ditched meetings, harassed the Founders, and generally tried to stick his nose in places he probably shouldn’t, but those all felt some degree of normal.  Frustrating, but Sigurd knew how to deal with that.  He wasn’t sure he knew how to deal with a horse.

            But he looks happy, something in the back of his mind whispered, and—so he did.  Brain wasn’t watching him; his expression had gone soft, hand carefully stroking the horse’s muzzle.  He looked more relaxed than Sigurd had ever seen him.

            He could feel something in him crumbling, and he knew he was going to regret this later, but he sighed, his whole body sinking with the sound.  “Well,” he said, resigned, “do we need to find somewhere to hide her?”

            Brain glanced at him, head cocked and eyes narrowed.

            “…We’re just taking her to the meeting, aren’t we.”

            (It was almost worth the odd stares and whispers throughout the meeting to watch Brain introduce the horse to his new-found friends later.  Almost.

            The fact that Brain apparently didn’t know how to ride the horse, however, felt a little more vindicating.)

[iamlostandinneedofcoffee]

I like to imagine that every once in a while Red Hood just goes off comms for long stretches of time and comes back bruised as shit and exhausted before logging off for the night and the rest of bat brigade is trying to figure out which villain of the week keeps jumping him.

Eventually they, cause communication is a skill no one learned, just start harassing hood’s men to find out whose turf they are invading only to find out they thought the bats were beefing with Red again cause he keeps mumbling about brats.

Now they are trying to find out which one of them is lying about fucking with Jason and no one is owning up, the trackers they keep putting on him are fizzling out, no one as any idea and Jason ain’t saying shit. But like he’s never properly irritated about it or asks for help nor can they find anything out so they let it go for now (read keep trying to track him to no avail).

And then one night Red Robin comes across Red getting chased and then fighting off a feral looking teenager on the roofs of Crime Alley and just when he looks like he is getting the upper hand another drops down from above (how the fuck the nearest taller building is not anywhere near close enough to dive into the fight from what the fuck?!?) and joins the brawl.

Tim is about to rush in to help Jason before the two teens’ heads turn in unison to him with Lazarus green eyes and look like cats when they see a red dot. Jason panics and before he can grab them, they leap and now Tim is in a cartoon brawl dust cloud and all and Jason has joined in and is calling them all brats and how his gunna whop their ass- and there is a foot in his mouth.

And yet through it all Tim never feels afraid. In fact, as he fights he realises they are keeping up and beating him all whilst smiling and punning(?!? They must never meet dick SHIT DUCK) and that won’t fucking do, so he brings out all his tools and tricks and is getting matching by two raccoon twins. 20 minutes later they are all grinning bloody smiles and just as he is about to slam his bo staff up into into the female looking twin, a whistle is blown.

They all freeze and look over in unison as if they all became shining quadruplets at a giant shit house built fucking man. And like Tim has seen big men. Bane is a big mother fucker. Superman is a big mother fucker, and is also shaped like one. Bats is big but this guy even though his is maybe not as large he feels infinitely more terrifying and that’s before you get to the flaming(fucking literally, how does that even work or stay in the pony tail) white hair.

“Alright enough for tonight or foods gunna go cold. Inside.” A voice bellows across the roof before the man disappears??!? At the mention of food the one top of Tim almost starts drooling, gets up and starts dragging Tim’s still prone body across the roof and off of it OH FUCK AND INTO A WALL WHA and they went through it… well

A couple second later Jason and the other dude stumble in. Jason picks Tim up as he is coming down from that mini adrenaline rush at and puts a arm around Tim, half hug half chokehold, saying “say nothing and you get to join once a week. Say shit and you’re haunted.” And walks off to the kitchen and starts bringing out food.

… safe to say the rest of the bats are now confused why Tim of all people is now turning up bruised as well with Jason, cause if it was him to start why has he started loosing all of a sudden??? And he says fuck all but his weapons and fighting style has got more chaotic and terrifying.

Oh and he seems to be eating… well you win some and lose some

[nibbelraz]

Pls consider MBJ looking between his spy and his spy's didi and just trying to make sense of these two

POV: you are Mobei Jun looking at your loyal servant glare absolute murderous daggers at you while his younger brother (that you didn't know about) is just staring at you weirdly

[caluette]

bastard münchen game night ⚔️

[starry-bi-sky]

im dedicating this to @detectivedarling. i felt inspired after seeing their little ficlet yesterday sadhjfl 🫶

-

Danny's grip on his cane tightens.

"What—"

His voice cracks. He stops, clears it, then tries again in spite of the nausea twisting in his gut. "What are — you, uh, watching, Bruce?" He sounds horribly far away.

Bruce doesn't look at him, his attention laser-focused on the screen. Which is— fine. It's usually not a problem, Bruce gets like that when he hyper-focuses on a case, and unless it's urgent — or he's been at it for hours — Danny sees no need to pull him away from it. He likes the quiet camaraderie they have, it's companionable and unique to the two of them.

He wishes he was right now though. Looking at him, that is.

That way he wasn't watching what was clearly one of Danny's ghost fights. One of the nastier ones, if the collateral damage and rubble on the street is of any indication.

Danny tries to remember which one that is. He shuffles a little closer to the desk, ignoring the rock in his stomach or the ugly weightlessness in his arms. It's not the blood blossoms, that much he knows. He just recently had an injection so it shouldn't be bothering him this soon—

So it's just nerves. Perfect.

Most footage of his fights are— messy, at best. Unusable at worst. Amity Park was obsessed with appearing 'normal' when they first started happening, and typical news stations censor the worst of the fights anyways for publishing, since they can get pretty gory at times. And ghosts move too fast to be caught on regular standard cameras, not including distance and light and—

That is to say— finding usable ghost fight videos is hard.

Danny wonders how Bruce got his hands on this one, and then stops wondering.

The audio is muted, which is - good. Good, because the fight is ugly and chaotic and clearly this was taken on someone's phone. Fuck, he can't remember if he ever saw that before — clearly not. They're hiding behind an overturned car, and Danny grits his teeth so he doesn't tell that idiot to run.

The camera turns up, and focuses on two figures in the air. It takes a few seconds, but when it does, Danny gets hit with a wave of vertigo. His grip tightens and he leans heavily on his cane, he waits for the black dots to disappear.

He- uh, he remembers this fight now. Uh, sort of.

He remembers being twelve at the time, and he remembers some of the injuries he got out of it. His eyelid spasms abruptly. This ghost wasn't one of his regulars, so he doesn't remember whatever name they had, barely remembered what they looked like up until- uh. Now.

Was he always that small? Well— Phantom's never been particularly big, perks of being a dead kid, but— it's - different. Seeing it from an outsider perspective. Was he that small? Or is it just because he's wearing a jumpsuit clearly too big for him that casts the illusion of being small?

Doesn't really - matter. Now. He can't access his ghost form, and he already knows the answers to his appearance.

Phantom is clearly bleeding, viscous and violently green like the bubbles of a lava lamp, clutching onto a limp shoulder that's missing an arm from the elbow down. Half his face is drenched in similar blood, the eye on the drenched side is closed — not because he can't see through the ectoplasm.

Danny's memories of that fight slowly come in a bit clearer. Right. He took a pole to the eye in that one. That had - hurt. A lot. Getting an eye gouged out usually does. It and the missing arm took hours to grow back.

He rubs his eye with his palm for no other reason than it itches.

The other ghost isn't untouched of any injury either, but he's not in a state of dismemberment like Phantom is.

Danny drops his gaze down at Bruce, whose sitting in his chair with his hands threaded together, looking so tense that Danny half expects to meet solid steel if he were to touch his back. His face is - blank. Terribly blank, with an intensity in his eyes that Danny doesn't see often.

He looks terribly distressed.

He opens his mouth, and finds that nothing comes out. His throat is thick with an ugly, tar-like feeling that makes his eyes sting. Kinda reminds him of when someone wraps their hands around your throat and presses. He closes his mouth, then tries again.

"B—" hhhhhh, "Buzz."

Finally Bruce looks at him, one hand slaps the space button on the keyboard, and the video pauses. His expression doesn't shift, but there's a weight in the lines of his face that reminds Danny of a set of weights sagging.

He looks quite like he's grieving something.

Bruce opens his mouth, his voice comes out terribly soft and heartbroken: "He looks like you."

Which is— a terrifying sentence in and of itself. One that makes Danny's legs shake and ignite his ragged, poison-chewed nerves alight with the need to run. An instinctive urge to deny, deny, deny.

How could he? He could say, that's a ghost, Bruce. I'm not a ghost. He could crack a joke, and ask, 'do I look dead to you?' or say something about how he knows that his parents studied ghosts, but that didn't make him one.

He could say that, and he could say it knowing full well that Bruce would see right through it. He'd probably let Danny too.

Danny closes his eyes. They sting, you see? So does his nose, right in the back like someone popped him in the face. And his throat is thick and gross and like someone stuck a spider, the big fat tarantula kind, right down into his esophagus.

He breathes in — through his mouth, because his nose stings and so it'd be best not to irritate it further with air — and it's terribly shaky and uneven. But it clears a pathway to his lungs big enough for him to say — whisper, really:

"You know, I think you're the first person to notice that."

[aestariiwilderness]

[puppppppppy]

god dammit gamefreak

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 3: Enveloping Feelings.

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 4)

[chiyana]

this is the stupidest crossover possible but I want Tim to make House his doctor

yes that House

why? He needs someone who is very good, will not give up or send Tim out to a different specialist just because his medical condition is difficult, will not be overly concerned about the danger Tim puts himself in, and will lie on Tim's medical records AND to Batman/Bruce Wayne/all of the Bats without hesitation or fear.

House is and will do all of those things without hesitation. He has no shame, no boundaries, he WILL get into a public fight with Bruce Wayne if it means keeping that man out of his patient's (and House's) business. He will help Tim lie to and gaslight the rest of his family without hesitation.

in exchange, Tim is his favorite patient. Not because they get along, necessarily, Tim is a know-it-all little shit and they constantly bicker and House hates how practically every facet of Tim's existence is a lie (and Tim thinks House is a smug know-it-all jackass who is needlessly cruel and callous bc he thinks the world owes him and never delivers just bc he's in pain, news flash a lot of people are in pain and manage not to be assholes) BUT, 1, Tim brings him really interesting cases and problems, and 2, Tim NEVER lies to House about his medical conditions or what he was doing when they happened.

He lies about literally almost everything else under the sun TO everyone else, but he is 100% completely upfront and honest about his medical history and what is going on with him with House.

admittedly it takes a while for House to realize Tim ISN'T lying to him because some of the shit he says is completely insane ("the vigilante thing is pretty obvious but what do you MEAN you got the Apocalypse virus TWICE, AND SURVIVED, AS A FOURTEEN-FIFTEEN YEAR OLD")

but once he realizes Tim doesn't ever lie to him, he becomes House's favorite patient because at least TIM gives him all of the data he needs as best he's able the moment he asks. At least House doesn't have to waste his time following up on bogus information or figuring out the truth, he can just get right into the meat of the medical issue at hand.

also it's so fun to lie directly to Batman's face, know the man knows, and know he can't do anything about it

[purrincesskittens]

@muffinlance I see your Zuko gets adopted by old sweepy and propose to you Zuko gets adopted by a random scholar at the Ba Sing Se University.

Look in Yuka's defense she has a lot of siblings, and Zuko at a quick glance could pass as her youngest brother. Yes, he should be at home still nowhere near Ba Sing Se, but her siblings end up in the strangest of places so she wouldn't put it past him to show up randomly. Doesn't help she already wears thick lens glasses, and her eyesight is just getting worse from all the reading in the dark she does. Also, she was deep in her research for the paper, and the kid she mistook as her brother was really useful at finding her just what she needed for her paper. He was also apparently an expert on Avatar research, able to spout off all kinds of facts and quotes where he got that research from. By the time she realizes this kid isn't her little brother, she's decided to adopt him anyway, and she will absolutely fight the Di Lee for him. He is her new research partner, and she'll list him as one of her sources if she has to. Then they can't take him as he is an integral part of the development of the culture of Ba Sing Se. Besides, the kid sucks at hiding the fact that he is a fire bender and needs someone to take him under their wing. Half her family are firebenders anyway. She may be small and mousy, but she can be mighty when it comes to her research. She is totally willing to throw hands with the Di Lee if it comes down to it.

Zuko isn't sure what to make of the small mousy scholar he accidentally stumbled upon while trying to find more research on the Avatar. Nor is he sure how he became her research assistant. All he knows is she started calling him Koji and talking to him like she knew him or rather knew this Koji and handing him scrolls to put away and requesting more works on the Avatar some he hadn't read before as Ba Sing Se was the one place he hadn't been able to break into until now. Then he starts spouting off his Avatar knowledge between what he knows of the current Avatar and what he read in old books and scrolls she just jots down what he said without ever once looking up at him. By the time she realizes he isn't this Koji person, she has apparently decided she is keeping him. She escorts him home or to the tea shop when she is done picking his brain for the day or treats him to good food and makes sure he gets enough to not only fill his belly but also to bring home to Uncle. When he gets fired from the tea shop for fighting Jet, she hires him permanently. She even argues that Jet is clearly delusional and needs help not to be carted off by the Culural Police. He is clearly scared so badly he can't see he is safe and that there is no war in Ba Sing Se. So Jet gets an involuntary stay in one of Ba Sing Se's finest mental hospitals with his own personal Joo Dee to look after him. It's around this time that Uncle realizes he may have to fight this young lady for custody of his nephew. At least he is staying out of trouble and expanding his intellectual knowledge.

[the-ineffable-dance]

Just a little reminder... this is the way Aziraphale looks on the way back into the bookshop at the beginning of the Final Fifteen.

The Metatrash has just told him to "Go and tell your friend the good news," and Aziraphale is headed back to convince Crowley to return to heaven to be an angel again.

That is not the face of a happy angel.

THIS is the face of a happy angel...

Or this one...

Especially this one...

No... what you have as he returns to the bookshop after whatever was said with the Metatron is not happy. That's the look of a man shaped being desperately coming up with a plan. Who knows that danger is staring straight at them, and suddenly he's in a perilous dance that he must do perfectly in order to protect Crowley.

He doesn't want to go back to Heaven. He has to.

[choccy-milky]

the place me and my roommate were supposed to move into today was so disgusting and uninhabitable we just took our stuff and left and now we're gonna be staying at airbnbs and hotels until further notice/until we can find a new place hopefully quickly...........im in my homeless drifter era y'all!!!😍😍so if im not as active then thats why LMFAO

1 like = 1 prayer

[fuzy-i]

Solarians as semi-realistic cats :

[keferon]

Hey, saw that you're having a bit of rough day. :(

I'm almost finished the next part.

But, would you like Prowl to bully "the wet bread moron" Josh? (as a treat. there's a part I could slide it in) Like a little petty revenge like get back at people being jerks to orcas?

-GLC

Oh I would absolutely love that yes🥺👉👈

[cynomain69]

i cant believe sethos is debuting on a haitham banner!!

[ask2ps]

brooo ur getting blood all over england's carpet ..... typical rude american